The Dog-Man Question
The lack of human hands was a dealbreaker for some members, who were told to “be the pickle jar opener in their own life,” by the group members who chose this option.
An Ode to the Turkey
Let me tell you, dear reader, nothing so wrenches the heart like turkey tears.
Welcome to the 1-800-GRADSCHOOL Hotline
We encourage you to recognize that your grunt labor for them is really grunt labor for us, and we would like to make sure we get as much out of you as possible before allowing you to limp away free.
Who Do You Think You Are?
I am not the same as I was at four years old, but I am the same person. Right?
I’m Thankful for Dua Lipa
Dua Lipa is one of the most erotic artists in the pop-music industry. Let me explain.
On Days Off…
If it’s not one job, it’s two, and if it’s not two jobs, it’s three.
Ten Songs About Being in Your Twenties
It’s easy to feel unaccomplished or running behind at this age, but Billy reminds us that we’re exactly where we’re supposed to be.
Walking in Warsaw
This is a stock-image city. Sharp. Neutral. Orderly.
The Heart Is a Muscle
It wasn’t a bleeding heart that sent me overseas for those years.
The Destruction Phase
Sometimes things have outgrown their usefulness, or are proven to be harmful, or you just find a better way.
