New York

(N)itrogen (N)erd

Being a terrifying nitrogen nerd is one of my brother’s very few failings, and in this case it turned out to be a great help.

I used to finish races like that so sweaty and happy and exhilarated that I didn’t need any rum to feel like the queen of the world.

There are several “worst parts” about driving across the country.

But I will often retrace the roads and words I’ve taken and exhale, exultant.

Seven years later, I am now in Grand Rapids again, which is a kind of beautiful, full-circle moment.

I care a lot about things like that. I want people to remember good things about me.

But I will say that—for me—being confined to my home has sometimes felt liberating in a small and quiet way.

I didn’t tell her we are planning on leaving too,
and I won’t get to say goodbye.

“Kids can’t learn when they don’t feel loved, right?”

It’s like merging onto a highway when you’re not sure you remember how to drive.