The busyness is good.
I noticed it in April: Reading Watchmen. Watching the HBO show afterwards. Four concerts in three weeks (five if you count work). Driving to Indy to see the eclipse. Maximizing time with friends visiting from out of town. Going on a podcast to talk about Bionicle for three hours. Reading for and recording and editing my own podcast. Running home to sleep to do it all over again.
For the first time, it feels like I’m succeeding at being single and in my twenties. I leave a bar concert at 11, the end of a buzz fading as the summer breeze caresses my face. I have work in the morning, but that’s not the concern at the moment. “Your twenties are like puberty for your personality,” a friend of a friend told me once, and I think I understand what they mean. I try new things, discovering if I enjoy them or not, learning about myself all the time.
The busyness continues into the summer. Working late on High School Graduation Ceremonies. Going to five pride festivals in four weeks. Leaving one early to go to a graduation party. Driving to DC for vacation. Maximizing my time there. Attending a friend’s play. Flying to NYC for Pokemon Go Fest. Hanging out with my siblings for a day. Staying up late on Fridays to play Magic: the Gathering. Going to the lake with friends.
It feels so good to exist and explore the world, to meet people and get to know them. I rush from place to place, striving to make the most of my time. I had a problem overcommitting in college, but that’s not what this is. Rarely is every night of the week filled in ahead of time. These are one off events. Spontaneously going to a movie. Sitting around a campfire with friends. Grabbing drinks for a first date. Going to a magic prerelease.
I’m not sure when I first had the thought that being busy was bad. I want to attribute it to memorizing Psalm 23 as a child, with green pastures and quiet waters restoring the soul. Maybe it came from one or two people being unable to attend a family Christmas party because they were busy. The seed that busy = bad stuck with me until this year, when I found myself riding the wave of event after activity after hangout and not drowning in it. Adulthood is about striking a bargain with the imp in your brain, staying on top of responsibilities while finding ways to have fun.
It’s exhausting. It’s exhilarating. In the midst of everything there is rest. I get the best sleep of my adult life after getting home from a concert at half past eleven. Even nights in are full of reading or writing or editing, but it balances the nights out. When it’s all too much, I leave my phone at home and sneak away to Lake Michigan to listen to the waves and to watch the sunset. Sitting for an hour or two on the sand feeling centered.
My time is filled, and it is good.

I’m still chasing this balance myself, but I am beyond thrilled to hear that sustainable busyness is not yet another mythic beast that someone in the American cultural consciousness has sold to me 🙂
We are happy to fill lots of time with you in this upcoming season 🙂