August 12, 2014
Today, I ruined 170 pounds of Chile Con Queso Dip.
I don’t want to talk about it.
August 14, 2013
It was Potato Boy’s last day.
We rarely spoke.
(Aside from the passing comments, like the time he thanked me for picking that potato up off the floor for him and the time I was wearing a Calvin College T-Shirt, and he asked me if I was going to be a freshman this year…
…it’s time to go back to Hope College, Potato Boy.)
August 15, 2014
I wish I could put “opened 486 cans” as an achievement on my resume, but I don’t think employers would understand.
August 18, 2014
Today, the radio turned on by itself. Again.
That ghost we were joking about earlier doesn’t seem so much like a joke anymore.
August 19, 2014
WZZM 13 filmed us for a “Made in Michigan” clip.
I didn’t agree to this.
August 20, 2014
It happened once before.
And today, it happened again.
The sealer didn’t seal.
Beet juice everywhere.
August 21, 2014
You know, when I was ten years old, I never imagined I would be shoveling potato salad. Life takes us crazy places.
August 25, 2014
I walked into the cooler listening to “today’s greatest hits.”
I walked out of the cooler to country music.
August 27, 2014
“IT AIN’T MY STYLE. I DON’T CARE...”
“…cowboys. They’re so full of ‘emselves.”
August 28, 2014
Today, I scooped 550 pounds of Jalapeno Cheddar Potato Salad.
Pardon my French, but: made it my bitch.
I also ordered no-slip shoes.
September 2, 2014
Today, the radio turned on by itself again.
And it wasn’t plugged in.
Just kidding. That didn’t happen.
September 4, 2014
I wore my no-slip shoes for the first time today. Didn’t slip once. I’m not sure why I’m surprised.
September 5, 2014
Today, my sock half came off in my shoe. I was too lazy to fix it. So I walked around like that all morning.
September 9, 2014
Liquid smoke, though. That stuff is potent.
September 10, 2014
Macaroni and Pasteurized Cheese Product.
September 17, 2014
“Hold it like you hold a bagpipe.”
September 18, 2014
I can imagine the dinner conversation now: “Is it just me, or does this macaroni salad have more parsley in it than usual?”
September 22, 2014
I can imagine the dinner conversation now: “Is it just me, or is this macaroni salad more yellow than it usually is?”
September 23, 2014
We make nothing with fish. Nothing.
And yet, the place reeked.
September 28, 2014
Potato Boy is the new intern at church.
The world is small.
September 30, 2014
“Smell this bucket.”
I don’t know what I was expecting.
October 2, 2014
Today, I accidentally flung Chile Con Queso Dip at my boss.
I do not have good luck with that dip.
October 6, 2014
Dishwasher is on vacation, so I did the dishes for 9 hours today.
At least the sink is by the window.
October 7, 2014
Manager: We found a 35 pound bucket of peanut butter in with the buckets of mayonnaise.
Manager: What do you want to do with it?
Boss: Is it creamy or crunchy?
October 8, 2014
Brought home 3 pounds of peanut butter.
October 9, 2014
“I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL…”
“You like to sing along to all the high songs, don’t you…”
Just for you guys.
Cassie Westrate (’14) graduated with a double major in writing and international development studies. She currently lives in West Michigan, where she works as a writer, hangs out with her pet bird, and fights crime by night. Just kidding about the crime.