Our theme for the month of March is “How to.”

Laying the groundwork:

It helps if you yourself have been hyperfixated on Dungeons and Dragons for the last two years, so I recommend starting with listening to a D&D Actual Play podcasts. I personally listened to all of Dungeons and Daddies and Worlds Beyond Number twice, in addition to a few seasons of Dropout’s Dimension 20. There’s nothing like a group of professional comedians goofing off to make you want to try it out for yourself.

It also helps if you have friends who are nerdy or at least associate with nerds. If you were to approach a non-nerd on the street with some dice and a character sheet, they might take off running.

Testing the waters:

Next start asking your friends if they’d be interested in joining a campaign, customizing the invite to their interests.

“I know you read Fourth Wing, and the campaign is going to be YA-fantasy themed!”

“You’re so funny, and you’d mentioned that you wanted to try improv. It’s a great opportunity!”

“I’ll make a cheese plate for every session!”

It might actually work a little too well.

Dial it back:

You’ll realize that you exclusively associate with nerds, and maybe you should’ve waited to hear all the responses before you asked new people. You’ll find yourself with two people more than what you can handle, and you’ll have to find an arbitrary demarcation so that your friends don’t get too offended when they’re cut.

Your friend will ask if it’s an all-girls campaign, and the lightbulb will go off. The two guys you asked are your partner and your friend’s husband, both of whom are already in three campaigns. Tell them that you’re so sorry, but you’ve decided to make it an all-girls campaign for newbies, knowing that you have the feminism card in your back pocket, just in case. They’ll understand and respectfully bow out. Your boyfriend will actually be visibly excited for you.

Panic:

You’ve never been in charge of a campaign before. Your partner hyped you up and told you that you’d be so good at this. You were such a natural. But suddenly you’re staring at a blank Google Doc with no idea of how to deliver on a YA-fantasy D&D campaign. Spend some time reading TVTropes.org and Goodreads book summaries.

You’ll remember that there’s always one trope you can depend on: magic schools.

Thankfully, D&D has more pre-written lore than you’ll know what to do with, and two very distracted work days later, you’ll have your concept.

Host a character creation session:

Since most of your friends are perfectionists, they’ll want to make their characters with you, and the best way to do that is by having everyone in one place. They can meet each other before you start playing, they can collaborate to make sure their party is rounded out, and you can see what kind of group they’re going to be before prepping their first session. After one of your friends chooses the last name “Choppedonions,” you know it’s going to be a good time. There’s more laughter in your home than you’ve had in a long time, and it’ll fill the space with warmth.

Play:

Running your first session will be intimidating. That’s just the nature of trying something new. But your friends will arrive and grab slices of the Costco pizza you picked up, and they’ll settle into the living room you rearranged to host more people.

Be kind to yourself. You’ve never been in charge of pacing before, so it’ll go a little slower than you like. You’re not going to have the lyricism of internationally beloved game masters, but you’ll improve with time. Focus on your friends—their focus on the game, their smiles, their chemistry. It’ll make the time fly by.

They’ll get their bearings quickly, making big swings and developing their characters’ voices. Give your friend an amp, and she can play “Eye of the Tiger” and “Fight Song” during battles. For Christmas, buy them dice that remind you of their characters. They might start texting sketches of the characters, which someone else might make into custom hoodies that are the softest sweater you own.

Over the months, your friends might make a point to tell you that they appreciate this little community you’ve created together. Making friends as an adult is hard, and finding groups of girlfriends is even harder. It’s something you’ll treasure, and it seems like they do too.

You’re all social butterflies in your twenties, so scheduling the next session will be the hardest part. Make a tradition out of pulling out your Google calendars and finding a time to meet the next month. It’ll give you something to look forward to. You may find yourself checking your calendar in the intervening weeks to see when you get to play next, and when you get to see them all again.

Tiffany Kajiwara

Tiffany Kajiwara graduated from Calvin in 2022 with majors in literature and writing. Now, she continues to live in Grand Rapids and works at Baker Academic Publishing as a marketing assistant. In her free time, she enjoys crocheting, thrifting, and psychoanalyzing cartoon characters.