Our theme for the month of October is “flash nonfiction.” Writers were asked to submit pieces that were 250 words or less.
In December of 2019, I had been dating my partner, Heidi, for about six months. We had planned to travel together to have Christmas with her family that year. On December 11, Heidi’s father had a sudden, unexpected medical complication and passed away. We still traveled together to Heidi’s hometown, but our plans became less focused on Christmas and more focused on the upcoming funeral.
In the nearly two years since, many things have still gone the way we expected them to. Heidi and I both graduated, got married, and found an apartment to live in. But I’ve been thinking a lot about the things that would’ve been different.
Our trip in December would’ve been her family’s first Christmas with her new boyfriend instead of their first Christmas without their dad.
He would’ve been able to see not just his first grandchild again but also his second on the way, and any more after that as well.
He would’ve kept carving the crosses, coasters, and other wooden crafts that we now treasure to remember him by.
And Heidi would have been walked down the aisle by him at our own wedding instead of placing her bouquet at the seat where he should have been.
We’re living without him now. But I still need to grieve all those stolen possibilities, and I’m not sure how long that’s gonna take.
Phil Rienstra (they/he) (‘21) studied writing and music, and since graduating has developed a deep interest in labor rights. They currently work at a unionized Starbucks and volunteer with Starbucks Workers United. They’re an amateur chef, a perennial bandana wearer, and an Enneagram 4. He lives in St. Paul with his spouse, Heidi.
I got mad that my mom was never able to tell me how to write a good cover letter; she told me so many times that she knew the secret after reading so many, but I hadn’t come to that bridge before she was gone.
The lost futures are particularly hard to swallow sometimes. You encapsulated them well here.