Currently, I’m sitting on the porch of a sky-blue A-frame home under a canopy of northern Michigan pine trees, sipping local kombucha and waiting for my friends to arrive. (Aka, I’m living my dream.) This is the second summer we’ve spent a week up north together, traveling from Saint Louis, Chicago and Nashville to work remotely, share communal dinners, and let the lake and stars and laughter bring us back to life.
I’ve dubbed this summer as “healing girl summer” (instead of the trendy, and probably more fun, TikTok-approved hot girl summer). I first heard the term from my friend Rachel, who is an inspiration always, and was motivated to embark on my own healing journey after seeing her personal healing girl summer play out. After years of frustration with health issues and finding few answers, I’ve been on a mission to tackle root causes and finally move forward.
Up until recently, healing girl summer was going great. I’ve been eating clean, going to therapy, writing and reading more, scrolling less, and spending time with people who ask hard questions, make me laugh and fill my cup. Before my annual trip to Michigan, I felt like I was thriving for the first time in a very long time.
But of course, self-care isn’t all face masks and vegetables and eight hours of sleep. It’s also working through your past, coming to terms with your present, and realizing you are ultimately the only one who can make the changes you want to see in your life. Making the choice to try again each day can be absolutely exhausting.
And unfortunately, it turns out that healing girl summer also requires enduring some temporary pain to step towards long term health. Last week, I had to cut ties with a close friend. The relationship was no longer serving me in the way I deserved, and my closest people advised me to move on. Letting go was deeply painful and much more difficult than I expected. (I cried until my TOP eyelids were swollen… who knew that was a thing.) But my dear friends gently talked me through why this was the right decision, asking all the insightful questions and encouraging me to press the “send” button each time. Seltzer in hand, I sent messages I desperately needed to send in order to be free from continued hurt. The people I trust the most were proud of me, and I was a little proud of me too.
Thankfully, I was able to immediately escape to the trees after ripping off the proverbial friendship-ending band aid, and I am confident that time in nature with my people will remind me of what’s most important. Until then, I’ll watch the trees sway in the golden hour sunlight, swim in the Lake Michigan waves, and I’ll remember that just because healing girl summer doesn’t happen overnight doesn’t mean it isn’t worth the fight.
Olivia graduated from Calvin in May 2018 with a double major in business and writing. She now works as an editor in Nashville, Tennessee and is eating her way through the restaurants of her new town. She enjoys weekend trips with friends, petting other people’s dogs, and drinking coffee like a Gilmore Girl.
