Previously:
Two Verses for Teachers
Another Verse for Teachers
Silent Night
Silent night, hole punch night,
Some is wrong, some is right
Round yon syntax clunky and tired
Student writing leaves much to be desired.
Press on grading their essays!
Press on grading their work!
Silent night, hole punch night,
Glass of wine to my right.
Trust they can show me all that they have learned;
Hope they still love me when essays are returned.
How many more in the stack?
HOW MANY MORE IN THE STACK?!
Silent night, hole punch night,
Teachers quake at the sight
Email with subject line “raising my grade?”
Eyelids start twitching from nerves nigh frayed.
Can’t you see it’s too late?
No. You don’t think it’s too late.
It Came Inside the Christmas Card
It came inside the Christmas card
That Starbucks gift of old
From moms who know we fill our cups
With that brown liquid gold.
And while we’re thankful for the gift
We cannot tell a lie;
While coffee is all well and good
We wish the drink were wine.
O Silent Halls of Our Dear School
O silent halls of our dear school
How empty now you lie.
And though we gladly send kids off
We’re sad to say goodbye.
For they remind us daily
Of why we want to teach:
They lead us toward the world to come
The peace we hope to reach.
Abby Zwart (’13) teaches high school English in Grand Rapids, Michigan. She spends her free time making lists of books she should read, cooking, and managing the post calvin.
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I love this!! Reading it from my classroom on my prep period. December is a hard one for teachers, keep up the good work!
Despite the grim times, there’s still some festivity to be seen. And I am always a fan of parody.